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Why are people afraid to feel?
Since I have been at college I have often met people who afraid to feel, or to share feelings. I do understand why, because it is a scary thing to do. If you open yourself up to someone you risk being hurt, but as someone who has been hurt (and badly at that) I would say the hurt doesn’t hurt as bad as the good feels as good (can you follow?). So if the good outweighs the bad, then I have to ask again:
What is wrong with feeling and showing that feeling? This is applicable to more than just the romantic sense or the relational sense in general. If you disagree with someone shouldn’t you say it? While you are in class do you listen to what the teacher is saying and just accept it because he has a degree in the field and you don’t? Or do you question it because you shouldn’t just digest and accept everything you hear as fact? Or do you just sit there and think quietly to yourself what exactly it is you would say if you weren’t afraid to share your own opinion (feeling) on the situation?
What’s wrong with questions anyways?
Why don’t people like to answer them? Or, why is that when someone asks a lot of them instead of getting a lot of answers they are labeled as liking to ask questions? My favorite kinds of people are the ones that ask questions and answer them, whole heartedly. If I ask you a question it is because I whole heartedly want to hear what you think. How does one get to know more about someone else’s feelings if they aren’t going to share them? If I want to know, and they aren’t he sharing type, then I have to ask.
Uncertainty should be a part of life while it is being lived, but when it comes to relationships (of any kind familial or friendship or romantic) someone shouldn’t be afraid to feel what it is they feel. Yet we never do what we should do, let’s face it people a lot of times don’t even know what it is that we are feeling.
Quote:
We love the things we love for what they are. – Robert Frost in “Hyla Brook”
February 23, 2008 at 7:52 pm
I was just having a conversation with someone about the fact that most people do just accept what they hear as absolute fact – especially college students – and we never question things or research them on our own. Granted, there are a few people who do question things. Sadly, though, they’re usually labeled as skeptics and non-believers. It’s funny how when people actually do act on what they feel…there are repercussions. BUT! I do agree with you that of course opening up to someone could hurt, but because usually comes with such amazing feelings, too, it’s worth it. There aren’t enough optimists in the world, Gabby. That’s the real shame here.